Honor Feelings, But Question Them

We have to honor our feelings. They point to our values. But, we can on our own or in therapy examine them. Often the feelings were embedded in a poor environment and do not currently reflect truth. To never question feelings is to be reactionary and robotic. Thank God we have an intellect. It is a useful tool. Balance is all!

Feelings

The best definition I've found for feelings is that they are "automatic value judgments." When someone expresses their feelings to you,  you can respect that they feel that way. However, it is an automatic value judgment and may not be currently valid. It may even be an irrational value judgment. 

You must acknowledge your own feelings, as well as others. But, you can question your own feelings, and other's feelings as to their current validity. The feelings may or may not be rational or practical. 

So many of our feelings were programmed when we were children. They often reflect the environment we had in our childhood. If the childhood environment was crazy or abusive, those feelings may be counterproductive in the outside world. Those values were only valid for surviving in that crazy family and are currently counterproductive. 

Therapy is excellent at unearthing repressed feelings. It is good to unearth them, feel them, and process them.  I personally respect my feelings, but I question them, and if I find they are not reflective of the truth I now know, or on reflection don't find them practical or productive, I let them go.

Ego Is Just A Tool

I see ego as just a manifestation of Being or Self in a focalized point. It is just a necessary tool of Self to have experience. Without form it is difficult to say we could have experiences. As a tool, the ego can be used ignorantly or wisely. Without following the prescription to "know thyself" we are ignorant. We think we are the body which the ego identifies with. As the ego develops it identifies with the personal characteristics. 

If through curiosity or suffering, the ego starts to look at itself, it can see its limitations and conditioned beliefs. It can dismantle itself. If done well, the ego takes the back seat and acknowledges a greater Self, or Being as the true and Original I. Then it is just a friendly tool used by the body/mind to survive and serve.

Instinct vs Ego

While animals have fairly set instincts designed for their survival, the human baby arrives with very few instincts. This lack of instincts is quite positive in regards to our adaptability. It's made us quite successful as a species. The downside of this is that we are programmed by family and cultural environment. This vast variety of influences creates tremendous differences between the values of human groups. 

As any of us knows, what we have instead of instincts is ego. And that is where our troubles start. As a replacement for instinct, ego is just as sticky and intransigent as instinct. 

Being one species, but with egos instead of instincts, it is difficult for us stay at peace. It is easy for one culture to see  other cultures as evil, less than human. They don't think like we do, so they must be eliminated. 

There is no easy way to change our ego. As a replacement for instinct, it will fight to the death in order to protect itself. Most of us think of our self more as an ego than a body. That's why we die in war. 

The awakening of people into non duality where we can see the ego for what it is, tends to make people more peaceful. Seeing the ego for what it is, is often experienced as a death. But on the other side is a oneness with others that may bring peace. Tolerance is much easier when the ego is seen through. May we all die before we die. Peace.